Thursday, March 25, 2010

Growing Up an Adopted Child

A child who is growing up adopted faces many benefits and advantages of being an adopted child. Of these many benefits the most significant one is growing up with two loving parents. These two parents put all their time, energy and love into providing the child with as much care as possible in order to assure that their child comes before anything and grows up a good life. What comes along with the opportunity of having two parents is financial security. In most cases the adopted child does not have to watch their parents struggle to pay rent or other everyday costs. This financial security creates a sense of happiness among the adopted child and his/her parents. Because of this financial security and the fact that the two parents want their child to be happy, the adopted child has the opportunity to fulfill everyday dreams. They can pursue trying new activities such as sports, painting, piano, etc, that they may not have been able to do if not been adopted. This creates an open mind frame for the child to pursue any goals or hobbies they want to accomplish in life. Another huge factor that comes along with being adopted is the chance to grow up in a safe neighborhood which then leads to a better education. Providing a better education for the child leads them for the opportunity to go to college and explore what they want to be when they grow up. The chances of completing college are much higher for an adopted child.

One of my close friends from home is an adopted child so I thought it would be interesting to hear first hand experience what it actually is like to grow up being an adopted child.

Me: When did you first find out that you were adopted and how did you feel about this?
*Courtney: “I don’t know when I found out when I was first adopted. My parents weren’t trying to keep it from me. They told me when they thought I would be able to comprehend what adoption was. They had no problem letting me know though. When I found out they explained it and it was kind of confusing. Whenever I wanted to have questions answered they were always willing to answer them and what not.”

Me: What is it like to grow up knowing that your parents are not your biological parents? Do you think this had a great impact on your life or the way you acted?
*Courtney: “No it doesn’t have a big impact. I don’t really think about it to be honest. At first it was kind of like “oh” it’s still not like I don’t know them I was adopted right from birth so that’s all I ever knew. If had been in a foster care till age 3 or 4 and had recollection of that it would have been different. It didn’t feel like they were strangers because of the fact I was adopted right at birth.”

Me: Because you were adopted do you feel this will influence you to adopt children in the future as well?
*Courtney: “I want to have my own kids but if for some reason I’m not able to of course I would. Also I may adopt a kid even if I am able to get pregnant. But it hasn’t been like oh just because I’m adopted I’m going to go adopt.”

Me: Do you hope/or have contact with your biological parents? If so what is it like? How often do you talk?
*Courtney: “Yes I have contact. Sometimes it’s a little much because she wants to be so much part of my life but at the same time she does understand I have my own thing going on with my parents and she respects that. She is eager to meet me in person and keeps pushing that so it makes it a little more stressful on me to make a decision that will please everyone.”

Me: Do you think that you will meet her? If so when?
*Courtney: “Yea. I’m not sure yet. But it has to be when I have more time to really think about that decision.”
* Name was changed.

Some questions to think about...
1) Do you agree with all these benefits of growing up an adopted child? Just because the child is adopted is it always granted that they will be brought up financially secure and with two loving parents as the sources state?
2) Do you know anyone who is adopted and grew up a life that was not so happy and had financial struggles? Do you know anyone who is adopted and grew up happy with a good life? How did being adopted turn out for that person to be?
3) What are your feelings towards adoption in general?

posted by Cassandra Knox, Nancy Chen, Kendall Eifler, Jessica Powell, Courtney Vataha


  1. Nikkii said...

    I really liked that you interviewed your friend for this. I thought that it was a really good perspective on adoption. I know a few people that were adopted and it seems they all have very different opinions on it. I used to know nothing about it and thought that everyone that was adopted thought about it the same way. I thought that they would all want to meet their birth parents. However that is not the case at all many do not feel the need or desire to meet them at all.


  2. I think that many times someone who is adopted is adopted into a financially stable family. However, I would bet that that is not always the case. Adoption is a difficult and expensive process that most people would not go through unless they had the money for it. I think interviweing a person who was adopted is a good way of getting information because it's so personal.
    I think that adoption is great, but I do think it is important to explain to your children at the right age that they are adopted and what adoption is. I think it is important to not keep it a secret.


  3. I like how you interviewed someone who was adopted. It gives the topic a more real sense than if research were the only references. The interview does a good job of explaining how adoption doesn't run someones life. In elementary school there was a boy in my class and all the people I knew would always comment on how he was adopted as if it were a bad thing. He also had behavioral issues, so it made adoption seem even worse to the students because he was the only example we had. Luckily we grew up and realized that adoption isn't a solution for parents who don't want their kids. It's more complicated and in many cases the biological parents still want to be a part of their child's life, like *Courtneys biological mother wants. We also assumed in elementary school that adoption was the only thing on this boys mind, but now we know that in most cases a child who is adopted finds it trivial and doesn't think about it much, like *Courtney stated.


  4. It was really interesting to hear adoption from someone who has actually gone through the process. It was intense to hear about her biological mother pushing to meet her in person, and I can understand why she would be hesitant but also want it. I liked the question about whether she would adopt children because she was adopted because I believe that many people either benefit greatly or little from being adopted and that would certainly change their feelings on the adoption process.

  5. I also thought the interview was a great way to gain a personal perspective from someone going through very similar experiences as us, but with an adoptive family. My cousin was adopted when he was 3 from a somewhat abusive family, and knew as he grew up that he was adopted. His family treated him very well, but even still, some behavioral and emotional issues existed and he had to have counseling throughout his childhood. Now, as a young adult, he is very successful in school and is very active with soccer. He has a supportive group of friends and is very happy. The transition of adoption may be difficult for many, but it is completely possible that children can grow to become healthy and happy after adoption.

    Elissa May