Homosexuality in the Media

     Society as a whole relies heavy on the media to teach them about groups of people with whom they have little contact. Stereotypes portrayed cement prejudices that people already have. The British Journal of Guidance and Counseling published an article by Lindsay Cooper that raises some great points about the portrayal of homosexuality in the media and its effects on sexual minorities. According to Cooper, “a significant majority (83%) of people believe that the media relies heavily on clichéd stereotypes of gay people.” She states, “Hollywood is the principle manufacturer of Anglo-American cultural norms that has provided us with these images…Popular images of gay men that are available, largely on film, are very negative: ‘the child molester, the self-hating, effeminate hairdresser, or the friendless, isolated, older gay man whom everyone pitied or tolerated until he ended it all.’” Those are not the only stereotypes that homosexuals have to deal with. The dominant discourse about homosexuals is that they are promiscuous, disease-ridden, over-the-top and super “fabulous”. With images like that running rampant through the media that we are constantly bombarded with, it is no wonder why some parents react so horribly to finding out their son or daughter is gay.


     Negative stereotypes in the media have a huge impact on the lives of homosexuals in a family environment. Some parents are accepting and understanding. Others however, react with anger or even violence. This can cause people to “stay in the closet” and deny their sexuality. Cooper wrote, “Factors that keep people in the closet include verbal intimidation and fear. All interviewees experienced some homophobia and were subjected to negative images and stereotypes of gay people.” One of the interviewees said, “…there was a time when I was 13/14 when people realized and I started being called gay. I realized I probably was. Of course, I denied it. That was quite a hard time.” (Cooper 425-440) Staying in the closet can push people into feelings extreme loneliness and states of depression.


     Stereotypes that aren’t necessarily negative also have a huge impact on family communication and the lives of homosexuals. Trevor Nutley once wrote, “There was a time when I could not speak to a family member without someone telling me. ‘Oh, Jack reminds me of you so much’ or ‘You and Jack are the same person.’” (Nutley 22) He was speaking of the flamboyant, outlandish, hilarious character from the TV show “Will and Grace”. Because of portrayals of homosexuals in the media, it is almost as if all gay men have to be performing all of the time and all lesbians have to be drama sponges. Sitcoms are meant to be for entertainment, but shows like “Will and Grace” and “The L Word” are being treated like educational television to get insight on what the lives of “real homosexuals” are like and it is simply a fallacy.

Citations

Cooper, Lindsay. "On the other side: supporting sexual minority students." British Journal of Guidance & Counseling. 36.4 (2008): 425-440. Print.


Nutley, Trevor. "Gay and cliche." Xtra! West 24 APR 2006: 22. Print.


Written by: Mollie Foley

Politics of Same-Sex Marriage

In 2004, Massachusetts became the first state in the U.S. to legalize same-sex marriage. For years before, and still today, same-sex marriage has been one of the most controversial topics in American politics. The federal government has yet to legalize gay marriage nationwide. The burden is on the state governments. The legislation surrounding this issue has a huge impact on American families. Currently, there approximately 1.2 million people in gay or lesbian couples in the U.S. This number does not include gays and lesbians not involved in a relationship. These couples are a new type of family in America, and the decisions made about their right to marry greatly affects their legitimacy and rights.

Gay Marriage Facts and Statistics

-41% of Americans support same-sex marriage. 49% oppose it. 10% are unsure.

-Total gay and lesbian couples in the U.S.: 594,391

-Number of people in a gay or lesbian couple: 1.2 million

-State with the most gay/lesbian couples: California

-State with the least gay/lesbian couples: North Dakota

State Laws about Gay Marriage

Same-sex marriage is legal in Massachusetts (2004), Connecticut (2008), Iowa (2009), Vermont (2009), New Hampshire (2010). Washington D.C. will have legalized gay marriage in March of 2010. Maine, New York, Alaska, California, Nevada, Oregon, Washington, and Maryland allow some rights to gay and lesbian couples, and recognize out of state same-sex marriages, but their constitution bans same-sex marriage. New Mexico, New Jersey, Rhode Island, and Washington D.C. currently provide certain rights for same-sex couples and recognize out of state marriages. Gay marriage is banned in these states but it isn't written into their constitution. All other states ban gay marriage and refuse to recognize out of state marriages or give rights to same-sex couples.

Oklahoma's state constitution states “Marriage in this state shall consist only of the union of one man and one woman... A marriage between persons of the same gender performed in another state shall not be recognized as valid and binding in this state... Any person knowingly issuing a marriage license in violation of this section shall be guilty of a misdemeanor.”

Alabama's state constitution says that “Marriage is...a unique relationship between a man and a woman.” It explains that it defines marriage as such in order to “promote...the stability and welfare of society and its children.”

Arguments For

Arguments in favor of legalizing gay marriage are usually centered around the notion of equality for all citizens. By denying gays and lesbians the right to marry, the state is making them second class citizens. Rights in America can not be denied based on sexual orientation, just as they can't be denied based on gender or race. Civil unions fall under the category “Separate but not Equal”.

Another argument is that the U.S. was founded on the idea of separation of church and state, which supporters feel dispels any arguments citing the bible as a basis for law. Marriage is no longer solely a religious institution since people who aren't associated with religion can get married. Marriage has become a social and political structure, and religion is supposed to stay out of lawmaking.

Supporters also argue that same-sex marriage is good for society. Economically, a lot of money goes into weddings and divorces that could be made if same-sex marriage was allowed. By allowing gays and lesbians to marry, they are being integrated into the mainstream culture and become more active members of society. By banning same-sex marriage, states are alienating whole sections of their populations and denying them legal and social rights.

Arguments Against

“Marriage is between a man and a woman” has been the motto of the opposition to gay marriage. Opposers believe that marriage is a religious sacrament, and therefore shouldn't be extended to those who don't live by the dictates of the bible or other religious texts and preaching. The Family Research Council claims, “Homosexual marriage is an empty pretense that...cheapens and degrades the real thing....no society has ceased to regulate sexuality within marriage as traditionally defined, and survived.” Opposers are concerned that if gays are allowed to marry, it will open a floodgate of “sexual combinations” who will all demand equal marriage rights as well.

A common argument in opposition to same-sex marriage is the defense of children. They think that it is dangerous to teach children to accept gay couples as normal, and that this kind of acceptance will destroy family values and poison children's minds. The FRC claims that “homosexual couples have an average of eight sexual partners (outside of the relationship) per year. Children should not be placed in unstable households with revolving bedroom doors.” Something to note about opposers is that many believe that homosexuality is a choice, having no biological roots, and therefore is reversible. This belief can greatly affect people's attitudes toward same-sex marriage.

Repealing Gay Marriage Legislation

Maine repealed gay marriage in November 2009, six months after it was passed. In New Hampshire, opposers work to repeal the newly achieved legalization of gay marriage. Probably the most famous repeal was Proposition 8, which repealed California's gay marriage of November 5, 2008. The votes for prop.8 were 52.5% yes (repeal) and 47.5% no. This repeal was especially significant because of California's notably high gay/lesbian population.

YouTube video supporting Prop.8

YouTube video against Prop. 8

Rights Denied

One proposed solution to the same-sex marriage issue is allowing same-sex civil unions. However, there are currently 1,138 federal rights given to marriages that are denied in civil unions. These include: the right to make decisions for a partner in a medical emergency, the right to petition for a partner to immigrate, family related social security benefits, the right to inherit property from a partner, and many more. Separate but equal is not equal.

 In states where homosexuals can't marry or get civil unions they are denied ALL marriage rights and benefits.

Census 2010

The 2010 census is the first that will count the number of same-sex marriages. Demographers expect many unmarried couples to report marriages since they would get one if it was legal.

What implications does repealing gay marriage have for the American Family?

Do you think that people's religious opinions should be respected in lawmaking?

Do you think it is dangerous to make laws about family structure? or is it necessary for culture?

www.gaycoupleslawblog.com

online.wsj.com/public/resources/documents/info-SAME_SEX_MAP_0905.html

www.frc.org

www.unionleader.com

abcnews.go.com/Politics

www.hrc.org/issues/marriage/civil_unions/386.htm

www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/article-30190.html

Gay/Straight Alliances in schools

Being a teenager is hard, but being a GLBTQ teenager can be even harder. Feelings of being an outcast, confusion about not understanding why you feel the way you do, fear of being judged, misunderstood, or even hurt, and even concern about how your loved ones will react. Some GLBTQ youth face the threat of being thrown out of their homes or worse. One way that some schools and organizations have tried to make this easier is with the creation of gay/straight alliances (GSA). These may have different names, different meeting times and places, and different goals, but they are united under one cause; to create a safe (or safer) and welcoming environment for GLBTQ young people as well as their Allies.

There are organizations, such as GLSEN (Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network) and GLAAD (Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation), and even the HRC (Human Rights Campaign), which have tools, workshops, and information which can help start a GSA or work with existing ones.

GLSEN is an especially good resource. Over the years they have worked to create and modify "kits" which can be used to help students and faculty create an effective GSA. They have tools such as "The GLSEN Jump-Start Guide for Gay-Straight Alliances" which includes information and instructions "designed to help you jump-start - or bring fresh and creative energy to - your student club." This can be found by going to GLSEN “Jump-Start” Kit . Have you ever heard or seen information about the National Day of Silence? What about the Days of Action of the No Name Calling Week? All of these are projects that GLSEN sponsor and organize.

GLAAD is also a great resource for kits and information. They have a list of these here: GLAAD Resource Kits .

The HRC has a Youth & Campus Outreach Program which offers students the ability to connect with each other, see if there are organizations that are near them, and even attend conferences and events. The main page for this program can be found here, HRC program

Some of you may be familiar with “The Laramie Project” or remember when the story of the death of Matthew Shepard in 1998. This horrific story and the national media attention that resulted from it is one of the reasons that GSA’s have been created or continued over the last 12 years. For more information, please follow the links under the questions at the bottom.

Questions:

Have you ever heard of Gay/Straight Alliances and did your school have one?
What do you think about the idea of GSA’s, are they still needed in schools today?
Have you ever been involved in an organization which brought groups together with the goals of education, understanding, and safety?
Did you know any GLBTQ people in high school? If so, were they involved in a GSA?
Have you ever been involved in an even sponsored by GLSEN or GLAAD like the Day of Silence?
Have you ever heard of The Laramie Project or other information on the story of Matthew Shepard?
Links:

GLSEN
GLAAD
HRC
The Laramie Project
The Matthew Shepard Foundation
The Day of Silence
 
by Laramie Ruggiero of Team 4: Rachel Cina, Molley Foley, Laura Koehler, Laramie Ruggiero, Laura Hickey

Gay and Lesbian Adoption

  When gay and lesbian couples choose to adopt they are faced with many challenging decision. Although gay adoption is nothing knew, more and more research and adoption options are becoming available for these families.  In general, adoption is a very extensive process that families think through very carefully before coming to their final decision.  Gay and lesbian adoption only adds additional concerns for the parents to think about when going down this route.

Since there are many different types of adoption options for families to choose from, it is key to research all of them.  Listed below are some options gay and lesbian families can choose from:

Question: What Options Are Available for Gay and Lesbian Adoptions?

Public Agency Adoptions: This is also known as a foster care adoption. The outcome of whether an adoption is finalized with this route is solely left to the attitudes of the state and the agency as each state decides who can adopt. The court will make their decision based on what they think is in the best interest of the child in question. This is of course extremely subjective.

Agency Adoptions: These adoptions are completed with the help of an adoption agency. Again, each adoption agency may hold different policies regarding working with gay or lesbian individuals.

Independent Adoptions: These adoptions are facilitated by someone other than an agency or social worker. This could mean an attorney or physician. These adoptions are illegal in many states. With these adoptions the placement is left up to the families involved. Again honesty regarding who you are is important.

International Adoptions: This option is complicated as it means finding an agency willing to work with a gay or lesbian couple and a foreign country willing to place a child in an alternative family. Many countries are not as accepting of gay and lesbian adoptions. Some countries are making these decisions based on their cultural standards and again, what they feel is in the best interest of their children.

Open Adoptions: Most of the above adoption options would be conducive with the choice of an open adoption. Open adoptions mean a level of contact with birth family. Open adoptions are also usually in the best interest of the child. Consider an open adoption during your adoption research.

 Second Parent Adoptions: It's also important for the gay and lesbian family to be aware of second parent adoptions and whether they are legal in your area. This option allows the child to have two legal guardians. http://adoption.about.com/od/gaylesbian/f/gayoptions.htm

With the many adoption options available for gay and lesbian couples to consider, research indicates that second parent adoptions are the most common. Second parent adoptions or stepparent adoptions are “The most common way in which same-sex couples adopt is that one partner already has legal custody of a child (either by birth or adoption) as a single parent. Then the second partner, at some later date after the adoption has been finalized, petitions the court to allow the second partner to do a second parent adoption of the other partner's child using the streamlined stepparent adoption process. Stepparent adoptions are the most common and least regulated types of relative adoptions in the United States. Second parent adoption allows a homosexual couple to adopt a child so that both partners have equal parental rights. For instance, the non-biological mother can adopt the child born to her lesbian partner without terminating the parental rights of the biological mother.” http://www.adopthelp.com/alternativeadoptions/alternatives2.html 

In today’s society it is much more common to see gay and lesbian couples adopting children to start families of their own. This being said, there are also some fears that are presented on the topic of gay adoption and gay parenting. Studies show that much of the concern is focused around the child’s understanding of sexual orientation and identification when they are brought up in a gay or lesbian household as well as if they will have additional problems due to their parents. There has not been any evidence of these concerns being true although other fears have been arisen.

Question: Will children be teased if they have homosexual parents?

Society has become more open and accepting to gay and lesbian couples but there will always be the people who disagree with same sex relationships.  Answers given to this question vary depending on the child’s age when adopted into the gay family as well as many other factors.  Research states that, “Gay and lesbian adoptive parents must also think about how they will explain to younger children, in age-appropriate language, not only how and why the child was adopted but also about the parents' sexual orientation. Both are complex subjects that should be addressed a number of times as the child grows and matures, each time adding new information as the child asks and is able to absorb and understand more. Then both topics become accepted facts of family life.” http://adoption.about.com/od/gaylesbian/f/teasing.htm

To conclude the topic of gay and lesbian adoption here are some questions to think about as well as some added cites to check out relating to different aspects of the adopting process.

Where is Gay Adoption Legal?

Lesbian and Gay Adoption Rights - Pros and Cons of Gay Adoption

Case Brief: Homosexuals and Adoption - Equal Protection – Gay adoption in Florida

Questions to think about:

What is your opinion about gay and lesbian adoption?

 Which adoption option would you choose to go through with? And why?

Do you think it will become easier for gay and lesbian couples to adopt in the future?

Sources:

http://adoption.about.com/od/adopting/tp/gayadoptionbasics.htm

http://www.adopthelp.com/index.html

Posted By: Laura Koehler, Rachel Cina, Molley Foley, Laramie Ruggiero and Laura Hickey

Explaining Gay Issues to Children

The issue of homosexuality has become so much more prominent in today’s culture then it was just a generation ago. Terms such as “gay”, ‘lesbian’, and bisexual are becoming much more common in today’s world. This shift is shown by how much more openly gay celebrates who are now in the media such as Rose O Donnell, Ellen DeGeneres, Lance Bass and Elton John. As well as movies and televisions shows such as Brokeback Mountain, Kissing Jessica Stein, Queer Eye and Will and Grace the show homosexual life styles.

As well as being more prominent in the media there is now a much bigger push for gay rights, such as in 2004 same sex marriage s became legal in Massachusetts, in November 2008 they became legal in Connecticut and just recently in March 2010 they became legal in DC.

This is such a drastic change because in the culture of the 1950’s the issue of homosexuality was a very taboo one and often swept under the rug and now people are much more open to this life style. When referring to someone as homosexual it means that he or she is sexually attracted to members of the same. Terms such as ‘gay’ refers to homosexual men and ‘lesbian’ refers to a homosexual women. The term ‘bisexual’ refers to those who are attracted to both men and women. Nobody knows for sure why people are homosexual, some studies oh human sexuality believe that it is a result of genetics social or individual factors, either alone or combination. Though since nobody knows for sure there is much confusion about this issue. As well no matter how far that gay rights have come there is still a long way for them to go because homophobia which is an irrational fear, prejudice or discrimination towards homosexual people. Homophobia can vary from name in calling in school to serious hate crimes such as assault and murder. Homophobia is usually based on fear and ignorance.

When wondering where people get these fearful and hateful ideas towards homosexual individuals it is interesting to explore into how parents have taught their children about this issue. When surveyed many people do not remember ever being spoken to about homosexuality as a a child. Some had it be explained and had it treated as any other type of relationship that was the same as a heterosexual relationship. Though many remember their first interaction with the idea of homosexuality to be in school. In schools terms such as ‘faggot’ and ‘gay’ are tossed around loosely as adjectives that have negative meaning attached to them. If that is a child’s first interaction with the concept of homosexuality it is no surprise that ideas of homophobia based on ignorance grow.

It seems that parents do want to shield their children from the concept of homosexuality. These commercials arguing for the passage of proposition 8 in California in 2008 prove how it was believed that teaching children about homosexuality would just confuse them.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PgjcgqFYP4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7352ZVMKBQM&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8j2y9WtTPw&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=75J3TN9Zzck&feature=related


As well as in Lexington Massachusetts there was controversy in schools when parents a second graders were protesting the teaching of a fairy tale about gay marriage to the class without warning the parents. The book “King &King” showed different types of weddings where a prince marries another prince instead of a princess. A Lexington parent complained staying “By Presenting this kind of issue at such a young age they’re trying to indoctrinate of children. They’re intentionally present this a norm and it’s not a value that our family supports”

Questions to Think About

1. If you were a parent how would you explain homosexuality to your child.

2. 2 Do you believe that terms such as “gay” or “faggot” are more likely to create homophobia.

3. Do you side with the parents who complained to the Lexington second grade teacher.



http://www.massresistance.org/docs/issues/king_and_king/book.html
http://familydoctor.org/online/famdocen/home/children/teens/sexuality/739.html
http://rockhawk.com/homosexuals_in_history.htm
http://www.protectmarriage.com/video/view/7
http://www.massresistance.org/docs/issues/king_and_king/book.html
http://www.sfbaytimes.com/?sec=article&article_id=4937
http://www.news24.com/Content/World/News/1073/043aeecea826459c852d8402a8a95bfa/25-04-2006-12-27/Gay_fairytale_sparks_US_debate
http://www.boston.com/news/globe/editorial_opinion/oped/articles/2006/04/27/when_parents_values_conflict_with_public_schools/
http://www.infoplease.com/ipa/A0761909.html
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/RNWYVKX

Adoption - Final Thoughts

It is estimated that each year 120,000 adoptions take place in the United States. Families start and expand through this extremely rewarding process. At the same time, as we have discussed this week it is also a strenuous and complicated process at times Just as having children is, adoption is a life-long commitment, and as we examined through assimilation and reunion discussions, one that brings additional challenges and experiences to the child-rearing process. Starting the process entails big decisions including whether to go ahead and use an agency or go about it independently, as well as whether to adopt internationally or intercountry. It also brings a large financial commitment, which can be as much as $40,000 dollars through some agencies. The legal documentation is also extremely taxing and lengthy, especially in international adoptions, which can take years to go through since both governments have laws that must be met. Depending on the circumstances and preferences of the adoptive family and/or the birth family, there is a plethora of options regarding the legalities of the relationship between the two families. The most common include open adoptions and closed adoptions. Whatever parents decide, the road to finally receiving your child is a long yet worthwhile one!

            As parents there are many different challenges to overcome that are unique to adoptive families. First, there is the big talk that parents must have with their children to inform them that they were adopted – and this can take place is a variety of ways and at many different times. Some parents choose to start explaining it to their children in bits and pieces from early ages, while others wait to have long talks during their teenage years. However, the discussion this week showed that most people have the opinion that it is most important to be honest and up-front with your children, no matter how you do it! Especially since the child will then need to consider whether they have an interest in pursuing a relationship with their birth family or not, which most people considered to be an extremely difficult reality for adoptive parents. We also looked at a number of valuable sources to help parents deal with the issues of assimilation in to the family, and building cohesion in light of racial, ethnic, or cultural differences. One response gave a personal account of a friend who always felt out of place in his own skin because of his racial difference from his adoptive parents – and this is a huge challenge that is important for families to be able to face through honesty and cohesion.

            We also looked at how adopted kids view their situation, and got very valuable information through a personal interview. The most noted and interesting points that people found in this discussion were that not all adoptees feel the same way about their status, and some want to meet their birth families while others have little interest in doing so. In the same way, others pointed out that being adopted does not control a person’s life or thoughts. They live every day just like all other children with families do! They also do not necessarily want to adopt kids themselves or have particularly strong feelings on the topic simply because that it was occurred for them. They want to make their own decisions just like anyone based on their goals and desires, not just on what their parents did.

            Another interview revealed the intense emotions and conflicts surrounding the issue of birth family reunions. Technology and social networking today have made a huge impact on this process, one that is positive for some and negative for others. However, in this case the interviewee was steady in faith and mature enough at the time of contact that she has maintained incredible perspective throughout her reunion. She even said she loved telling her story! At the same time, there are many points in her story that could cause intense conflict in other adopted children – such as her birth mother’s lack of interest in her life, her sisters’ label for her as the “lucky one”, and the fact that they contacted her unannounced. In general, the overall feeling after this interview was that birth families really need to show control, respect the agreements they have made, and restrain from contacting their children especially before the age of eighteen.

            Lastly, the current hot topic surrounding adoption in the United States has come about due to the historic natural disaster in Haiti, which has left many adoptive families in the United States searching for their children, attempting to get them home, and some even starting new adoption processes in response to the crisis. The consensus here was that the United States has responded well to this issue by loosening their regulations to help adoptive families unite with their children and bring them in to the country. However, it is also agreed that in light of the crisis situation, there is no justification for any adoptions that do not meet all regulations and standards because they are there to protect Haitian families and their children. While expediting an ongoing adoption is positive, attempting to bypass laws in order to obtain one is not.

            In conclusion, it seemed that people were thinking about adoption and adopted children in new ways. More things to consider are whether or not any of this information changed your opinions about the adoption process, parenting an adopted child, or being an adopted child? Has your perspective been expanded regarding any of these topics? In addition, how does the information presented in the blog relate to what we are reading in the text? Do you feel as though it has enhanced what has been presented in the reading? Has anything conflicted with what you’ve read in this class or in general? And lastly, what do you think would be the most challenging or the most rewarding part of adoption for you?

            Children all over the world are looking for families and homes, and no matter how exhausting or difficult it may be, the bottom line is that it is remarkable how many people are searching and anxious to welcome them in to theirs. 

Sources:

“Chapter Six: Adoption”

http://www.abanet.org/publiced/practical/books/family/chapter_6.pdf

Posted by: Courtney Vataha, Kendall Eifler, Nancy Chen, Cassandra Knox, and Jessica Powell